The Electrode Less Travelled
The tall blonde Swedish girl points to my trousers
and orders: Get Them Off! So I get them off.
I am told to lie down and think of Ulrike.
(She doesn’t really say that but that’s what I do.)
She sticks needles up and down my legs.
I have to compare each tiny pain to every other.
Then I’m wired up with electrodes that send electric pulses
from the nerve endings in my feet up my spine and back again.
If I shock you too much you can sue me for abuse—
so shout when the pain becomes unbearable.
I check that her badge reads NHS NEUROLOGY,
not GUANTANAMO BAY RENDITION CENTRE.
The readings I’m getting seem to suggest that
there might be an underlying non-neurological problem.
I think you will need to see your doctor for a blood test.
Also, it will help if you provide a urine sample.
I mull this over.
Let me get this straight—you’re getting on my nerves
and now you want my doctor to take the piss?
So, what’s left for my friends to do?
Madam: Archbishop Fisher (July-August 2024) does not resist the attacks on his church by the political, social or scientific atheists and those who insist on not being told what to do.
Aug 29 2024
6 mins
To claim Aborigines have the world's oldest continuous culture is to misunderstand the meaning of culture, which continuously changes over time and location. For a culture not to change over time would be a reproach and certainly not a cause for celebration, for it would indicate that there had been no capacity to adapt. Clearly this has not been the case
Aug 20 2024
23 mins
A friend and longtime supporter of Quadrant, Clive James sent us a poem in 2010, which we published in our December issue. Like the Taronga Park Aquarium he recalls in its 'mocked-up sandstone cave' it's not to be forgotten
Aug 16 2024
2 mins