Graeme Hetherington: ‘Ursus Horribilis’ and ‘Home’
Ursus Horribilis
(What’s in a name?)
She called me “Bear”, meaning at first
“My Ted”, knitting me a brown
Coarse-textured heavy cardigan,
Which I, mistrustful of a nick-
Name from an English wife referred
To as a straitjacket, a trap
Imprisoning my bulky form,
That of an unkempt shaggy beast,
An escaped cannibal-convict
Captured to dance to Madame’s tune.
It seemed a harmless joke to share,
With just a bit of an edge as
Lovingly she zipped me up, till
I drunkenly labelled all Poms
As “born-to-rule inveterate snobs”,
And woke to her having hung round
My neck “Ursus Horribilis”.
In fulfilment of this I soon
Was her sore-headed grizzly who
Dipped paws in other honeypots
And uprooted the tethering stake
Of marriage, fleeing for fear I
Might tear her hunting-dog tongue out,
Baiting me now at every turn.
Graeme Hetherington
Home
Teetering timidly on the edge,
Afraid to take the plunge, immerse
Myself in blood and sweat, I seemed
Misplaced, born all wrong…
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