As all will know who dip into The Guardian to keep tabs on the latest lefty passions stirring the hearts of ninnies,  the writers and editors are to rational thought what grease traps are to kitchen sinks. No wonder they didn't see the downside in my neat scheme to put John Kerry in the White House

What were the Human Rights Commission’s attacks on Bill Leak but attempts to silence him? Why else apart from fear and cowardice do media outfits marginalise conservative content? How else other than dumb censors would you categorise the Press Council's scolding ninnies?

Bill Shorten abused an Asian shopkeeper unable to satisfy his yearning for a pie. Today he's Mr Caring-Sensitive and that incident has gone down the memory hole, just as Turnbull's backers forgot his abysmal record as a leader and vote-winner

The UN’s emphasis on per capita emissions tells us next to nothing about planetary survivability but a great deal about the world body's dishonesty. We’d be well rid of a corrosive organisation that is home to more criminals than Chicago in the 1920s. In per capita terms, of course.

One doesn't like to cite oneself as an example to the youth of Australia, but in this instance I'll make an exception. If you want to land that job you've yearned for but can't figure how to get a foot in the door, here's a tip: turn up, forget about money and look eager. You'll be halfway there

I once found myself in Kevin Rudd's company and mentioned, for want of something better to say, that Julia Gillard's poll numbers were holding up. Soon thereafter the PM's hand was about my throat, just not quite touching. It was the shortest, clearest message he ever delivered

Said the ardent young socialist to the ABC, 'I was born when the Soviet Union still existed, but I have no memory of it and it doesn’t inform my politics at all.' It's frightening to realise how, even with a universe of fact and history just a  click away, the stupid are determined to stay that way

When certain types insist something will go disastrously wrong, it invariably turns out just fine, so it is important when preparing for imminent doom to first acquaint yourself with its latest prophet's record of divination. Thai restaurants are far more reliable guides to the future

When the Big Three couldn’t compete with nimble imports flooding the US, the automakers' first instinct was to grope for the taxpayer teat and suckle long and hard. Oh, how the mighty do fall, in this case from building one B-24 bomber every hour to the shamelessness of mendicant also-rans