Michael Connor

The ASIO tapes – Louise Malaprop

SUBJECT: Louise Malaprop is Director-For-Life of the South Melbourne University Press (SMUP). Mrs Malaprop is the wife of renowned actor and esteemed purveyor of charcuterie to the gentry Max Malaprop.


Mrs Malaprop at the Mirboo North Writers’ Festival: “The statement by an ill-informed and vicious Quadrant contributor (audience hisses and boos) that Australian publishers only publish Left authors and that bookshops only stock Left books is an absolute calumny of the integrity of Australian publishing and bookselling (cheers). Now ladies, the truth of the matter, as everyone knows, is that publishers don’t give a hoot for the political bent of writers, our only concern is whether a book is good and if it will sell (standing ovation).”

Mrs Malaprop addresses the SMUP board: “Comrades, let us never forget the iron rule of Australian publishing – right-wing books don’t sell (the comrades applaud for a very long time). Now to business. The print run of John Pilger’s new biography of John Howard. Should we do 40 or 50 thousand copies of the Braille edition?”

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