The signs were plain for all to see,
the signs I should have heeded.
The stuff out there on offer was

the stuff I never needed.
He wasn’t what I thought he was

and not what I required.

I should have sent him back

before the guarantee expired.

Love regrettably, love unforgettably,

It fills your head from A to Z, it’s alphabettably.

He grew like a convolvulus;
I should have had him weeded.
I was a silly cow and much
too easily stampeded.

He was a dirty rat but that’s
the way their brains are wired.

Before he made his big advance

he should have been retired.

Love regrettably, love unforgettably,
It fires your soul like Nat King Cole, no bleeding sweattably.

I should have made my mind up, though
he wheedled and he pleaded,
For nothing he could say or do
could ever have succeeded.
I should have seen it coming long

before it all backfired.
I should have sacked the bastard
the day that he got hired.

Love regrettably, kiss-kiss, kismettably,
Beneath the moon, too late, too soon, love unforgettably.

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