My eldest sister Ormé was named after a horse. Not any old hack, but a winner of the Grand National. It was a ploy by our father Geoffrey for his daughter to share his cousin’s given names: Elizabeth Orme. He gussied it with an é so his wife wouldn’t notice. Freda thought it was fine because it rhymed with gourmet and she was curious about French food. Ormé was a dreamy, chubby child with an embarrassing stammer. Freda enrolled in literature courses at the CAE, leaving Ormé with a neighbour who happily indulged the girl’s appetite for crumpets with honey.…
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